Dear La Petite Mort, I think my game is broken. I haven't been out on multiple dates in years. I'll admit, I'm sort of a particular guy. If I want to see There Will Be Blood and she wants to see 27 Dresses, done. If I want to talk about Obama and all she can say is, Oh Britney! she's finished. It might seem picky, but I never want to settle. If she's too short,......

Dear myphl17: What have you done to me? I realize I'm unemployed (again – sigh), but I swear, I really do have better things to do with my time than watch you. And yet here I sit, as often as three times per day, finding out who the baby daddy is, what the lie detector said, and whether it's a chick or a dude in the dress. That's right. I'm watching Maury. (Oh, I......

Every weekday of December (except for December 25, that is), Phillyist will be counting down to 2008 with our highlights from the past year and our predictions for the next. If you have a list you'd like to submit, let us know! I'm not really a big partygoer. I much prefer to spend my weekend nights curled up with a nice book in front of a warm fireplace... as long as the book is a......

As the weather gets yucky (this week's high temps will be at or near fifty, but we're looking at rain, rain, and more rain), I find myself reluctantly taking SEPTA more and more often, often during rush hour. Because I try to be a courteous SEPTA rider, I make a point of not putting my belongings on the seat beside me if the subway car, trolley, or bus seems to be getting crowded. I......

To the Writers Guild of America: It's not that I don't support your fight. I do. I've signed your petition. I'm a writer myself, and I'd hate it if I wasn't profiting from my own work. (If I was working in TV or film, that is – bloggers don't exactly earn residuals...) But here's the thing: as I write this, I'm watching a month-old episode of Journeyman. My DVR is 95% full. I've just discovered......

Ah, what I wouldn't give to be the average George Bush supporter at this very moment in time. If I could, then I could delusionally ignore what I have just seen and pretend like everything is all right with "the home team." Yes, the Eagles just thoroughly dominated the overmatched Jets! Yes, there are WMDs hidden behind one of the flat-screen TVs in Saddam Hussein's palatial domain that just haven't been found yet! Yes, voting......

By Bill Hayes and Pencopal This week, the Renegade Phillyists are feeling slightly less hateful, but just as snarky. Think of it as haterade lite. So instead of picking people off one by one, we've decided to taze them. Bill's To Taze List: 1) The people at Pitchfork. If you've heard of an album, they probably think it blows. I've been listening to the latest Tegan & Sara album, The Con, and I have been......

Sometimes, it's hard to resist the hate. You may not be having an especially bad day – you may in fact be in a good mood. But sometimes the snark comes so naturally that you have to marinate in it. Like it's Lawry's. Today is one of those days for two Phillyists who found themselves in an e-mail conversation about Tori Amos, lactating, and people we'd like to have killed. This may be in poor......

I arrived at the Mann last Friday with nothing but the highest of expectations, and I left positively annoyed. It wasn't because of the weather (there was a thunderstorm between A Fine Frenzy and Neko Case's sets, but I loved it). It wasn't because of the audience (although there were plenty of obnoxious people there). Those are things that you get annoyed with, and then get over. First annoyance: we arrived at the Mann at......

Despite the fact that Transformers is a film based on a cartoon, which itself was based on a story that a marketing company came up with to sell a line of toys, and despite the fact that it was directed by Michael Bay (a piece of news which, when it first came out, caused thousands of nerds to cry out in terror, and then become suddenly silent... before running to the internet to voice their......

Dear SEPTA: I've had the honor of taking you quite a bit lately. The new man in my life, you see, currently lives out on the Main Line. And I'd just like to tell you, if I may, that a schedule is not a suggestion. It is a schedule. Sure, your trains run more or less on time during rush hour in the morning and afternoon. But in between? Not so much. The trains are......

You may have noticed that yesterday's video post has been taken down. It should never have gone up. That was a huge, huge oversight on my part, which I am completely mortified by. I'm not here to defend my actions. I'm only here to tell you that I made the unfortunate mistake of listening to the video while I wrote a Film Festival diary, rather than watching it. If I'd actually watched it, I'd have......

Films: Exiled, Sisters Future Screenings: Exiled, April 8 (today), Ritz Five at 2:30PM Sisters, April 10, Prince Music Theater at 9:30PM Yesterday was only my second day at the festival, and already I think I'm losing it! I got to my first screening a full 40 minutes early because I had somehow become convinced that it was at 7PM and not 7:30PM. Then I stood in the wrong line for about 10 minutes. I also,......

Films: Paprika, 12:08 East of Bucharest Future Screenings: Paprika, April 8, Prince at 9:45PM 12:08 East of Bucharest, April 8, Ritz Five at 9:30PM Stop me if you've heard this one before: "It's just a movie; you're not supposed to think about it. If I wanted to think, I'd read a book." Movies, in the popular conception, are either mindless entertainment or the sort of medicinal experience you wouldn't voluntarily seek out. Well, let me......

Films: Hula Girls, The Guardian’s Son, Life Support Future Screenings: Hula Girls, Saturday, April 7th, Ritz East at 9:30PM The Guardian's Son, Saturday, April 7th, Ritz East at 2:15PM Life Support: Sunday, April 8th, Ritz East 2:30PM This is the first time I have become involved with the Film Festival and honestly, I don't know why it took me so long. I enjoy film and thoroughly enjoy watching films from around the world. For my......

Jackson O'Connel-Barlow of Grand Buffet, on influences, sweatshops and baseball cards....

I would be a complete hypocrite if I said that I wasn't guilty of the occasional breach of decorum. I like to think that I'm better than most, but that doesn't mean I'm perfect. Fortunately, I'm the co-editor of this pretty big blog in Philadelphia, where I write a manners column, and I can use that column as a forum for others to learn from my mistakes. I'm usually really good with alcohol. Few people......

To your daily liquid-crack intake? As a recent college grad, with little to no money left after my rent and utilities are paid for the month, I’ve got no business going to Starbucks every day. When I first started my Rittenhouse Retail job, I kept my budget in mind and made sure my caffeine fixes came from Dunkin Donuts, or my own personal coffee maker. But my will is weak and Starbucks coffee is......

A little while back, I was getting ready to go out for drinks when Latoya puked all over my apartment. The friend I was heading out with looked horrified as I explained that I couldn’t clean it up immediately, because I was entirely out of paper towels (and running low on toilet paper. And all but one of my dish towels was already crammed into my laundry basket. This was not my finest hour.). Then,......

The last time I got into a cab, I realized that I had enough money to pay for my ride, but not enough to last me for the rest of the night. I asked my driver if I could pay with a credit card. He said “No, reader’s broken.” I asked why every cab in town seemed to have a broken credit card reader (because multiple people I know have been told this, and......

I worry that you, our readers here at Phillyist, are going to start thinking I'm too nice. I seem to like just about everything. But honestly, that doesn't make me nice. It just means that local theatres are putting up a lot of great work. My Children! My Africa! - the Wilma's current production - being no exception to that. The play, penned by South African writer Athol Fugard, really affected me in a......

I can't believe this year is over. It has come and gone in a haze of concerts, martinis, deadlines, endings, beginnings, highs and lows. Goodbye 2006. You came and went like a 30-second john trying to get blown for half price. Hello 2007. What surprises will you bring? Pencopal's top 10 albums of 2006: 1. TV on the Radio: Return to Cookie Mountain. Aside from the fact that after meeting Kyp Malone inside the......

Since we originally composed this question, Rupert Murdoch has declared that he has ix-nayed both the book deal, and the ensuing Fox TV interview (this is what we get for preparing posts ahead of time). However - despite the news that this show won't go on, we're still curious why you think it ever was conceived in the first place. Speculation as to why it got pulled also welcome. Regardless of public opinion on the......

No, this is not a post about love in automobiles. It’s about men in automobiles, and the dumbass things they yell: “Heyyyy beautiful!” “Damn, you’re fine!” “Nice tits!” The list goes on. One could assume they do this to find some form of love, but that is a notion I just can’t accept. I mean, I generally go, “Why? Just why?” when men on the street yell anything at me (do they actually think I’m......

I love entertaining. If I made more money and I could keep my apartment clean (it's not that I'm messy, it's that I don't have time to make sure that I put everything away), I'd have weekly dinner parties. Or teas. Or brunches. This is a recipe I made for a brunch this past weekend that can be used on all of those meals. As always, the recipe came straight out of my head,......

Dear Readers: If I tell you that I feel old, I’m not looking for you to tell me, “oh, but twenty-three is still so young, you still have so much of your life ahead of you!” I’m telling you I feel old because, goddammit, I feel old. You going to argue with me about my emotions now? Seriously? It’s been happening for a while. I mean, I threw my back out for the first time......

Twenty-five hours without food or drink. (That's a lie, actually: I drank water to stave off the dehydration-based migraines that I get. I figured God wouldn't mind; the fast isn't supposed to ever endanger your health.) Sure, Ramadan lasts longer, but you never have to go a full twenty-four. Just have breakfast early and dinner late; skip lunch. The usual corporate eating schedule. And Lent doesn't even kind of compare. I know that several Eastern......

The Rocky Horror PUPPET Show (playing through Saturday - but don't fret if you miss it; they'll be staging it again in October.) I had a heavy internal debate before going to this show: to dress or not to dress. Or, rather - should I attend the show in some state of undress, it being an incarnation of the Rocky Horror Show. In the end, as it was the opening performance and I hadn't......

...Drunk Drunk Drunkity Drunk Drunk: Paris Hilton finally got hers. (Via Yahoo!) ...Proof of Life: Suri Cruise exists. And she's actually beautiful. (Via The Superficial.) ...Auctions: Come on, you know you want the outfit from the "If I Could Turn Back Time" video! (Via Reuters.) ...Awesome: And our love for Johnny Depp grows. (Via I Don't Like You In That Way.) ...Skank: Lindsay Lohan. Again. Twice. (Via Egotastic, with some very, very NSFW photos......

Dear Incoming Class of 2010 (at whatever local university you may be matriculating at): Welcome! Four years ago this week, I was in your shoes. I'd been to Philadelphia exactly once before I moved in to my dorm at Penn. I'd been on the East Coast twice. I wasn't entirely sure what I was getting myself into. And I couldn't have been more excited. You see, I chose to go to Penn because it......