Monday Manners has been trying so hard to improve your manners for the greater good that we recently realized that it's been a while since we posted anything about the manners of more, er, personal relations. We've already covered mutual satisfaction and graceful sleepovers, but we thought we'd go a little more innocent this time and cover something all of you have probably experienced, for better or for worse: the first kiss.

Say you've finally had a really nice evening with that special girl or guy from down the hall that you've spent a month eyeing, and you want to show your companion -- in the purest way possible -- that you wouldn't mind doing it again. You know as well as anyone else that actions speak louder than words, and saying "call me" doesn't always mean you genuinely want the other party to do so -- sometimes, it's just polite. What to do? Howsabout a quick little peck? Nothing lingering, no tongue, no saliva exchange. At least, not at first. The deeper, more passionate kiss can follow immediately, if both parties are feeling it, or a date or two down the line, if both parties want to take things slower.

But, how do you know when the moment's right and you'll end up with a receptive kissee rather than a black eye? The well-mannered kisser can read all the signs leading up to the moment of lip-lock. Has your companion been mirroring you (i.e. picking up his/her glass to drink at the moment you do) over the last few hours of your date? Is s/he laughing more at your jokes? Is there less distance between the two of you as you walk or stand beside each other? Does his/her body language seem more relaxed as the evening goes on? If the answer is "yes" to most or all of these, then you'll probably be pretty safe if you go for it.

But don't be pushy!

Keep your eyes open as you start to lean in, so you can see if your companion is leaning toward you as well (it sounds creepy, but it'll keep you from embarrassingly kissing the air). If your partner kisses you back, the kiss still shouldn't last more than a few seconds. You can put your hands on/arms around your companion's waist or shoulders, but make sure your hold is light, and you only maintain the hold for a moment after the kiss. Don't keep hanging on for too long after your lips part. It can get uncomfortable for both of you. Don't push your companion against a wall, into a reclining position, or do anything too forcible that could imply that you're looking for more than one chaste kiss. No licking, no biting, no forcible-lip-parting with the tongue. You can save all that for later.

If, after that initial kiss, it appears that a hardcore make-out session (or something more than that) is in store for the evening, then go for it! (As long as you make sure that both parties are receptive.) But that first moment of contact should always, always, be played safe. You never get a second chance at a first impression, after all -- or a first kiss.

Image Credit: Flickr user frielp